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“I am annoyed with you, Reshma. You are always late with your reports and it is not acceptable. Don’t do it again.” |
If Jennifer delivers the above message to Reshma she will simply cause her offence, aggravation, confusion and negative emotions.
Jennifer needs to construct her message in a manner that follows the PCEN Principle:
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“Your monthly departmental reports are very thorough, Reshma. When you are late submitting them, however, I am unable to prepare on time for the monthly managers’ meeting. It is important for us to get these reports in on time every month, so let’s discuss what we can do to help us both meet our deadlines.” |
Let’s break the message down:
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“Your monthly departmental reports are very thorough, Reshma. |
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When you are late submitting them, however,… |
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…I am unable to prepare on time for the monthly managers’ meeting. |
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It is important for us to get these reports in on time every month, so let’s discuss what we can do to help us both meet our deadlines.” |
Using the PCEN Principle in this situation will lead to much more positive communication outcomes than if Jennifer had delivered her original message.
Addressing delicate issues with our peers offers special challenges because we don’t have any formal authority over them; it therefore takes thought, practice and skill.
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“You’re always taking the credit for my ideas, Jameel. It isn’t fair and I am getting really sick of you.” |
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“I enjoy working with you, Jameel. |
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When it seems as though you take the credit for my ideas, however,… |
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…it makes it look like I haven’t contributed, so I find myself becoming quite frustrated and upset. |
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I think it would be really beneficial for both of us if we could work out how to overcome this and share the credit for our ideas.” |
The final step of the PCEN Principle, Next Steps, is particularly important to remember when addressing an issue with our manager. They are likely to respect us more if we can show initiative and have a suggested resolution to a problem, rather than simply adding to the numerous problems they may already have to deal with.
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“I just can’t work under the pressure you place on me, Pierre – it takes more than five minutes to put a quality presentation together.” |
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“I really appreciate the valuable input you provide to my presentations, Pierre. |
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On a couple of occasions, however, I have been asked to make late changes to a presentation… |
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…and doing this at the last minute has caused a lack of detail and leaves no time for rehearsal. |
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I understand the need for the changes and would like to suggest we make a practice of meeting a few days before the deadline, so I have time to use your constructive feedback to maximum effect.” |
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